New Years Resolutions-Year End Recap!

Well well: looks like 2011 has come and gone and it went by so fast! I miss (most of) it already!  Remember when I made my 2011 resolutions alongside my monthly goals?  Let's see what I actually got done this year!

1) Donate more-whether it's money, clothes, time I want to do more of it. According to Der I get "donation binges" where I tear our home upside down and inside out ridding of things we no longer need/want and give them to some that do. No harm in it and I like it. I totally did this! I got rid of/gave a lot of clothes, energy, dishes, supplies, money, support, and time this year-all donating to friends, shelters, family, the community, etc.  It's very humbling and rewarding to help others and to continue to de-clutter my home.


2) Stay healthy, hopefully slimming a bit in the process. I have no real reason not to and if you read this blog you'll know what I mean. Well...I was doing well...until this summer and especially this fall with school.  A main goal for 2012 is to re-vamp all of my health stuff so we'll see what actually transpires.

3) Do well in school. I always have and don't plan on stopping. I did =]  I could have done a tad bit better but considering-I am proud.

4) Travel more-this is a big one because Der and I both love to travel. Whether we go to Florida to see the in-laws and/or Disney World, California to see Patrick and/or Der's grandparents, or Chicago (just because I really wanna go) I want to get more traveling under my belt in 2011. The only place travel won't count is to Chattanooga since I go there all of the time. Travel I/we did! We went on The Delta Queen (though I know I said I wouldn't count Chattanooga...this only counts because it is a traveling hotel that happened to be docked in Chatt. and is pretty awesome), enjoyed a little time in The Smokies, I visited my family in Oklahoma, learned a bit about Jack Daniels in Lynchburg, and checked out one of my favorite cities with my hubs!  May not be too much (or too far) for some but it was enough to get excited about and close enough that it wasn't a fortune!  I definitely want this to be another goal for 2012 (and hopefully it will be complete too!)

5) Read more-I think when I get a Kindle this may be a bit easier. Now don't get me wrong: I love a good library smelling book as much as the next person but carrying 20 books in my over-the-shoulder tote doesn't seem to make sense for my shoulders or for purpose sake. So, with the Kindle I can lightly carry around the classics (not to mention my school books) for traveling and class sake. Psssh-I ROCKED this goal! I read 35 books that were not school related!  This includes e-books (via my Kindle) and hard copies. I won't lie-this is pretty cool and something I totally want to carry over into 2012 (and every year!)



6) A photo a day project: if you're linked with me on Facebook.com, I am hoping to do a project where I take a photo a day and talk about it-traversing my year in 2011 through photos. Once I get a real camera this will be made much much easier but until then, crappy cell phone pics will have to do. 1 down, 364 to go! Oh I totally failed this, ha ha! I did about 60ish days and then just plum forgot!

7) Finish Raley home. We've lived here almost 8 months and everything isn't finished-in part due to finances, in part due to forgetfulness, lol. I want everything completed by the summer if possible, but by Dec. 31 2011 at the latest. Well-This is kind of done, LOL. The bedroom still needs some work but the rest of the place is pretty much complete!  I need to post pics....

8) Go to at least 1 concert. I'm not really concerned as to whom I'm seeing but I want to see at least one. I don't think 2010 had any for me (at least none memorable) so I'd like to remedy that. HECK YEAH! Der and I went to see RUSH!  I had wanted to go see my favorite band (Incubus) but the closest they came to Nashville was Atlanta and it was smack in the middle of the semester...maybe next time?

9) See more theater-especially since I am jonesing for it so much as of late. Whether it's professional ("Spring Awakening!") or local (MTSU) I want to see more of it. I did! I saw: MTSUs "Medea" with Kelly, saw Tonya in "Hairspray", MTSUs "RENT" with Tonya, a couple of 1 acts with Tonya and Ben at Out Front on Main, saw "Little Shop of Horrors" directed by Kelly at the high school she teaches at, and saw MTSU's original play "Lady Parts". Definitely felt good to see some theatre this year =]  I didn't see a completely professional show but maybe 2012 can remedy that.

10) Celebrate. I don't care if it's for weddings, birthdays or sheer fun-I want to jump for joy even more this year though 2010 had a LOT of that going on. Life is for living, after all. Oh-SO SO SO many celebrations were had this year! It's very incredible to realize how awesome the people in your life are and to celebrate them and their/your accomplishments. I saw people (and dogs) getting older including me, I saw friends having babies, and saw friends getting married.  I celebrated life with the passing of Clyde, Long John, and Anna. I also celebrated a 3 year relationship and 1 year of marriage with my boo. I have successfully completed 1 year of Graduate School in the journey of obtaining my Masters of Arts in Sociology.  I have helped send my best friend off to Hawaii for the NAVY and have celebrated the purchase of my sister's first home.  And duh-I celebrated holidays with great coworkers, wonderful friends and awesome family. 2011 was chucked full of amazing celebrations and I am so incredibly glad and thankful I was able to take part in all of them.

2011-You weren't bad.  You absolutely had your downs but your ups more than made up for it.  Cheers to bringing in 2012 with smiles, laughter and a lot of goals accomplished!

2012-I've got a good feeling you're going to be just as good.

December Goals-completed!

December was a whirlwind and I miss [most of] it already-it went by too fast!  Check out what I got done!

*Around the House
-Finish hanging photos. COMPLETE-I finished hanging and placing pictures (finally!) in the living room.  I love how it turned out! Now maybe one day I'll get to the bedroom, lol.
-Sew clothes needing mending. COMPLETE-all with the exception of 1 hoodie that I will need a sewing machine for.
-Mail out Christmas cards. COMPLETE-I even got the festive stamps too, ha ha!
-Put up Christmas decor. COMPLETE!  It  was nice re-arranging everything and decorating our tree. That's always one of my favorite parts.

*Celebrations (YAY!)
-Celebrate Christmas with Derrick, Kelly, Wes, Andrew, Dylan, Tonya, and Ben. COMPLETE-Duh, it was awesome!
-Celebrate the holidays at work with co-workers. COMPLETE-It was so much fun!
-Celebrate the holidays with family. COMPLETE-what a great time and busy day we had!
-Celebrate my mom's birthday. COMPLETE-although it was early because her birthday fell on a Wednesday and she would be back in the Noog for it.  When we went out on our shopping day I gave her the card we got her and bought her lunch! It was fun and I'm glad I got to celebrate a bit with her!
-Jen and mom come up for shopping and fun. COMPLETE! As always, tons of fun was had even though I was sick.
-Celebrate goodbyes with Elisa and John since they're moving to Hawaii =( COMPLETE-although I sure am going to miss them!
-Celebrate time off from work and school COMPLETE-probably the best time off I've had in a LONG time.

*School
-COMPLETE my second semester of Graduate School (1 year down baby!) COMPLETE-1 year down, 1 more to go!
-Be content with my grades, whatever they may be. COMPLETE! Everything worked out just fine =]


Well-I think this may be a first in my blog history that I have a full month with nothing but completes!  It's a nice feeling and a great way to end the year =]

Cheers December-you were fun and fast!

Family Christmas!

Christmas in my family is a big deal.  NOT because of the gifts but because of the family time we all enjoy and the memories we're making with more and more family members throughout the years.  It's really a special time and even with different beliefs, we all put that aside and get together for the day and just enjoy one another's company.  That is why I look forward to Christmas each year and this is also why it will be one of the hardest things I'll have to cope with when me move away (because at least for a few years, we won't be able to come home on every holiday like we have been these past 4 years).  I love Christmas with my family!  Let me recap you with the Christmas/family activities.

Christmas Eve, though Der and I have both been sick off and on for close to a week, we woke up at our own accord and opened our gifts and stockings from each other.  It was a lot of fun because the past few years we haven't been able to do a lot for one another for Christmas.  This year we were and even though we were sick it was still fun opening gifts, laughing and spending time together.  I forgot to take pictures (probably for the best since we were both sick)! After checking out our loot, we loaded the car up and headed to Chattanooga to spend Christmas Eve with my mom and the next day with my family!

To start Christmas day, we (the kids) got together at my mom's house in the morning and opened our gifts, drank coffee, and woke up more before getting ready to start our hectic day.

Mom's tree-it was STUFFED with gifts!

Me and my boo Christmas morning, lol.

My brother and brother in law opening gifts.  Mom played Santa and was the last in opening her gifts but she loved them! We're a pretty simple family when it comes to gifts (though the tree tells a different story!).  We mostly give/get books and some DVDs and we're all perfectly okay with that.  Christmas to my family is about family and togetherness.

So after Christmas at mom's we got ready and headed to my dad's house for Christmas with my grandparents!  It was weird because we kept saying "Clyde's house" even though Uncle Clyde is no longer with us.  My dad lives in his house now so it was kind of like Uncle Clyde was there in spirit and it really helped make that even more special.

Daddy's little tree and the gifts.

A bunch of the family just hanging out. We were waiting for the food! My grandmother's (Dot Dot) sister was coming over with all of the food-she brought stuffing, and HUGE ham, dumplings, green beans, mashed potatoes, mom brought deviled eggs, and there was so much more! We had another party to go to that evening so we didn't fill up but it was hard because it was all so delicious.

Me and my sister! I'm wearing the new top my mom bought me and actually look decent now, ha ha!

My sister, my Dot Dot, Dave, and my brother-in-law Steve.

Der, my daddy and me.

The kids with Dad! From L: Der, me, Brad, Daddy, Jen, and Steve

After Dad's we headed down the road to my Aunt's house for the annual Christmas party!  This is where my mom's side of the family all get together to eat a ton, do a dirty Santa gift exchange and take pictures.  It's a pretty laid back atmosphere and good for all of us to get together.

Just the start of the YUMMMMMMMY food everyone brought!  I made the Oreo truffles again for the party-and as expected, they were a success!

My sister and awesome cousin Lauren.

My aunt's tree and the beginnings of the dirty Santa gifts!  I forgot to take pictures during the actual game but we had a great time changing out gifts.  I got a candle set and Der got a car cleaning kit! Both great and practical gifts.

The girl cousins! From L: me, Jen, Lauren, Sara, and Haley. Jen is the oldest cousin and Haley is the youngest.  My cousin Kevin couldn't come to the party but he and his wife are expecting a baby at the end of January so once he's born he'll be the youngest.  We are all so excited to meet him!

My family. From L: Steve, Jen, Brad, Mom, me, and Der.

We took this picture really quick-Jen and Steve had to leave to go to Steve's side of the family's Christmas.  The Der, Brad and I left to go see my other grandparents before trekking back up the mountain to collapse in our merriment.

What a JOYOUS and wonderful Christmas we both had.  I feel extremely humble, blessed and happy that I have such a fantastic family to celebrate holidays with.

Oreo Truffles

I know pinterest is showing these all over the place and they are the CRAZE right now with everyone...and understandably so! They are divine and so super easy to make-great for ANY fall/winter party or get together!  If you are any kind of chocolate fan, you'll fall in love with these little bites!  I feel silly because I've made these twice in the past week and both times forgot to take pictures-oops, haha!

Check out this killer [and easy] recipe!

Oreo Truffles

Ingredients needed:
*1 pack of Oreos
*1 pack of softened cream cheese-fat free or regular works just fine.  (Make sure the cream cheese has sat out for at least 10 minutes and is soft before trying this-when it's softer it works much smoother).
*1 bag of chocolate chips (this can be any kind-I used both white chocolate and milk chocolate)
*Festive sprinkles (optional)

Supplies needed:
*1 large mixing bowl
*1 mixer-hand or automatic work just fine.  You can technically do this by hand but it would be much easier and less time consuming to use a mixer of some kind.  Call me lazy but this isn't how I like to work out my arms and spend my time, haha!
*Wax paper
*Trays (I needed 2 for this amount-both about 12"x6" baking trays)
*Rolling Pin (optional)
*1 Tablespoon (optional)
*Food processor (optional)
*Toothpicks (optional)

Directions:
Step 1-Break up entire pack of Oreos.  Using a food processor works best but you can also break them in pieces, stick the pieces in a large Ziploc baggie, and crush with a rolling pin.  The point is to get the cookies to a power like state.  Once pieces are "powder", place in a large mixing bowl (plastic bowl=not the best idea...I'll explain later).
Step 2-Place softened cream cheese in the large mixing bowl with the Oreo "powder".
Step 3-Mix Oreo "power" and cream cheese together.  You should end up with a dough like mixture.  **I say use a glass or sturdy mixing bowl because when I tried this with my flimsy plastic bowl crumbs went EVERYWHERE-on the floor, in the dog bowl, behind the counter...everywhere! So I would highly suggest using a glass or porcelain bowl to mix to avoid this mess, haha!**
Step 4- After making the "dough", pour chocolate chips into microwave safe bowl and put time on for 1 minute.  After 1 minute, stir chips and heat for 1 minute more.  After this, stir and you should have melted chocolate.  There are many other ways to melt chocolate but I find this works best when time is of the essence.  **I used both white chocolate chips and milk chocolate.  You can use whatever you want to make them taste awesome-this is the coating!**
Step 5- I used my [clean] hands but you can also use a tablespoon to scoop up/roll the dough into walnut size balls-obviously you can make these however big or small you need to but I find these are good sizes for finger desserts.
Step 6- Once balls are formed, roll/dip them into the melted chocolate.  You can utilize a toothpick, a spoon or your fingers to do this-just make sure they are completely coated in chocolate.
Step 7- Once balls are dipped in chocolate, place them on the wax paper covered trays.  Sprinkle if you wish.
Step 8- Place ball covered trays in the fridge to harden.  They need to harden or they become a gooey mess.

And that's it!  They need to chill for at least 20 minutes but they can stay overnight if you want.  Pull those puppies out, place on a serving dish and voila!  You're done! SO simple, pretty quick to make and SO SO good!  Mine came out a little messy but they more than make up for it in taste!

I hope you try this out-you'll wow your friends and not spend a lot on ingredients! Cheap and easy-why wait?!

Happy baking!
J

Friendship Christmas!

On Wednesday Der and I hoped in the car after work with a car full of presents to head to the Blackwoods for our annual Christmas get together! I was so excited-it had been 4 months since I'd seen Kelly and Tonya (which is WAY too long for us) and even longer since I had seen Wes and the boys! 

It was so nice being able to catch up with everyone and play with my growing nephews.  I can't believe Andrew is turning 4 and Dylan 2 in the next 2 months! Time flys so fast with those two!  We ate, laughed (a lot!) and exchanged gifts.  I got a wonderful bracelet and pair of earrings from the Blackwoods and a cute coffee mug, some homemade cookies and a set of Santa salt and pepper shakers from Tonya!  AHH! It was perfect =]  Der got some Reese's (tradition) from Tonya and a GameStop gift card from the Blackwoods.

We had such a great time that we almost forgot to take pictures!  These are from the end of the night when Dylan was in bed and we were getting ready to head out.

Me and Der

Me and my PRECIOUS nephew Andrew!

Momma Kelly and her 1st born Andrew

The three girls! Me, Kelly, Tonya-we didn't mean to match but we did! Too funny.

Close up of these 3 friends

My lovely 1st nephew Andrew cuddling up with his Dad Wes.

Tonya and her beau Ben

Our FABULOUS hosts-Wes and Kelly!

I can't to see everyone again in 2 weeks for Andrew's 4th birthday party!

GHC Christmas Party

On Wednesday the 14th (also my Mom's birthday!) I headed to work after a day of errands to celebrate our Christmas party!  We had such a great time and had such yummy food!

Check out our fun pics!

The yummy desserts everyone brought-they were SO GOOD!

All of us chowing down on our catered lunch!

Kristy enjoying her BBQ in her Santa hat.

We were all digging in-we had waited all day for this lunch!  From L to R: Me, Summer, Melissa, John (in back), Racheal, Todd and Kristy.  Amanda was hardly in any pictures since she had the camera but she was there too!!  After we all ate the main course we started playing our dirty Santa game-it was SO funny and I think everyone got some really cool gifts!

Me opening my gift: aloe socks, candy and a cool thermos/cup!

Melissa picking another gift after hers got stolen!

Melissa had one the crock pot cookbook!  Amanda tried stealing it from her but Melissa wanted it so bad she ran around the table and over people to keep it, hahaah!  Amanda told her that she could have it only because she was so nice because Amanda really wanted it! It was such a great laugh!

Summer got a nice bottle of wine!  John ended up stealing it from her so she got some coffee and a cute mug instead.  The other gifts were: a Bath&Body Works gift card, a picture frame, some homemade cookies (3 dozen!)

Next we played a couple of games where we could win gift cards!  The first game was where we had to guess who's memory was whose and it was a riot!  Todd won that one and got a $25 gift card to Red Robin!

Next was this really cool game where you had a partner and had to wrap a "present" with only 1 hand-each partner could contribute only 1 hand each to wrap it! Talk about hilarious!!  Below are a few of the finished products from a few teams.

 

Team RN: Summer and Todd hard at work

Team SCC: Me and Kristy-and our horribly wrapped gift, haha!

Team Therapy: John and Melissa so quiet and diligent!

Team Nurse: Amanda and Racheal with their candy gift.  Amanda kept hoping to win for cleverness but team therapy won 2 gift cards!

It was such a good time-I'm so very thankful and grateful that I work with such an awesome team who feels like my other family.  It was a yummy, hilarious and relaxing time to spend with my friends.

THANKS GHC and until next year-Christmas 2012!

How 'bout a post that doesn't consist of just goals?!

Remember that time when I was a blogger? Yeah-me neither, LOL.  I realized that since October I haven't really blogged about anything but goals in such a long time!  And that's lame.

Life has been insane.  Yes, yes I always say life's insane but these past few months have been the craziest/most stressful/hardest/most challenging/most tiring months of my life thus far.  And that's saying something because I was a Theatre major before Grad. school...which if you know anything about theatre-life is like that ALL OF THE TIME.  But this has been different on so many levels, LOL.

I haven't been up to too much lately-just completing papers, projects, finals, etc.  I've finally decorated the house for Christmas and have been getting over a sickness.  I'm about 85% better now-hoping I'll be at 100% come this weekend.  I feel great being back at work on a more regular schedule and being able to actually do my job.  I've been so scattered in splitting work and school that I hope I haven't slacked too far behind on either....We'll see about that in a few weeks.  I also said good-bye to John and Elisa-they are moving to Hawaii after Christmas and already moved out of the Boro to head to California to celebrate Elisa's graduation/birthday before the move.  I'm going to miss them so much!  We've only known each other for a little over a year but it seems like so much longer.  Luckily, Der and I are hoping to go to Hawaii this summer to visit Destiny so hopefully we'll get to see them too!  YAY!

Anyway...

I can hardly describe the excitement I feel in having almost 4 weeks off from school.  It's such a strange feeling knowing that when I go back in January I start my thesis (officially) as well as chip away at another semester in obtaining my MA in Sociology.  Bizarre.  I may be going to a conference in April to present a paper Dr. A and I worked on too-it's in California!  A lot of Der's family live out there so if I get to go he'll come with me too so we can visit! Very cool.  I'll also have to defend my thesis and hopefully get it approved before May.  Once that's done I can actually start the analysis and start looking for jobs after I graduate! AAAAAHHHH!! It's bizarre.

I know all I ever seem to talk about is school but it's pretty much the dominating force of my life right now.  And it will be until December 2012, LOL.

I'll have more posts to come detailing Christmas parties and such so look out for other menial blogs!

Cheers,
JR

December Goals

Wow-I can't believe the year is almost over!!  I have a lot planned in December but I am SO looking forward to partaking in all of it! Sure they are goals but most importantly they are (mostly) fun and exciting! Lots of celebrating in store for us!

*Around the House
-Finish hanging photos.
-Sew clothes needing mending.
-Mail out Christmas cards.
-Put up Christmas decor.

*Celebrations (YAY!)
-Celebrate Christmas with Derrick, Kelly, Wes, Andrew, Dylan, Tonya, and Ben.
-Celebrate the holidays at work with co-workers.
-Celebrate the holidays with family.

(like last year)

-Celebrate my mom's birthday.
-Jen and mom come up for shopping and fun.

(Our annual tradition is to go shopping through the Boro and have a great and warm lunch at Steak N Shake)

-Celebrate goodbyes with Elisa and John since they're moving to Hawaii =(
-Celebrate time off from work and school

*School
-COMPLETE my second semester of Graduate School (1 year down baby!)
-Be content with my grades, whatever they may be.

November Goals-complete!

Well well: November was insane (as all months are seeming to be, LOL) but let's see what I got accomplished.

*Fun
-Celebrate Destiny's 25th birthday! COMPLETE-though the term celebrate here means "ship package and attempt to talk for a bit on the phone", LOL
-Celebrate Thanksgiving COMPLETE-and it was awesome though entirely too short.  Der had to work from 11:30 Thanksgiving night through noon on Black Friday so we had a quick turn around from the festivities-still worth it though!
-Create template for holiday cards using Shutterfly like last year. FAIL-since we didn't do Christmas pictures this year I'm just going to buy some old standards-not as fun but get the point across just the same.
-Read a book for fun, not class (though I'm not sure which one yet). COMPLETE-I have read:
1."Favorite Wife: My Escape from Polygamy" by Susan Ray Schmidt.  Very interesting read-insight into a rogue polygamist cult.
2. "Gods Behaving Badly" by Marie Phillips-comedic read about Greek Gods living in a modern day London.
3. And I also started "An Ordinary Man: An Autobiography" by Paul Rusesabagina-this is the autobiography that sparked the film Hotel Rwanda. I'm only about 72 pages into it but I can already tell it's going to be GREAT!
-See the play "Lady Parts" COMPLETE-It was a great night to get my mind off of school and get back into my roots of theater-I actually cried a bit, lol!
-Continue Christmas shopping COMPLETE-I am so good and so close to being done =]
-Throw another "Grad Hangoutage" for all of us COMPLETE-Only 3 of us showed up but it was a great girls night that I really needed!

*School
-KEEP SANITY DRAW-I think because I did and I didn't, LOL
-Start thesis stuff COMPLETE-I've got a lot of re-working to do but I've still got 2 semesters to tweak it ;]
-Work on Theory analysis for Final COMPLETE-I've gathered my articles and plan on starting on it Wednesday!
-Continue methodology for Methods class COMPLETE-It's going smoother which is good.
-Garner interviews for Masculinities class DRAW-I've sent out the interview guides but I don't know if I'll have them back before November is officially over.

COMPLETE-9         FAIL-1      DRAW-2

Now-it looks like I had entirely too much fun and not enough school but BELIEVE ME-I stayed busy busy!  December will be just as intense but in a completely different atmosphere-I can't WAIT!

November Goals

Though I feel like my main goal should be "keep my sanity",  I will attempt to list what else I've got to/want to get done this month.  Basically-this month will be divided between fun and school...where school is 98.19305% of my time.

*Fun
-Celebrate Destiny's 25th birthday!
-Celebrate Thanksgiving
-Create template for holiday cards using Shutterfly like last year
-Read a book for fun, not class (though I'm not sure which one yet).
-See the play "Lady Parts"
-Continue Christmas shopping
-Throw another "Grad Hangoutage" for all of us

*School
-KEEP SANITY
-Start thesis stuff
-Work on Theory analysis for Final
-Continue methodology for Methods class
-Garner interviews for Masculinities class

October Goals-done done!

I know it's a few days late but here's what I (barely) got done this month!

*School
-Submit abstract to ASA conference. COMPLETE! I should hear something about if it's accepted or not soon!
-Make all As on projects/papers/assignments. FAIL- Nothing but a ='( will do here
-FALL BREAK (a much needed break indeed)! COMPLETE! And it was everything I wanted and more!!
-Attend the Undergraduate Symposium (and potentially present). COMPLETE-and I'm so glad it's over, lol!

*Family
-Jen and Mom come to visit! COMPLETE-Jen wasn't able to come up due to work but Mom did and we had SUCH an awesome time!
-Visit with Aunt Lynn during FFFF weekend (see below). COMPLETE-and she looks good! She has shaved her head but her spirit was high and wonderful and she loved seeing all of us <3
-Fall Family Fun Fest (FFFF) at the end of October! This is when ALL of the family on my mom's side gets together for food, lots of laughing, and games. COMPLETE! And it was SO much fun (as always)!


*Fun
-Attend the SlutWalk in Nashville with friends from school. COMPLETE!
-Continue raising awareness and supplies for the battered shelter in my town. COMPLETE-though now I need to drop off all I've collected!
-Celebrate Tonya's 25th birthday! FAIL-we were both too busy I suppose?
-Celebrate Halloween! DRAW-I say this because we didn't go to a party or dress up this year but we watched scary movies and bought pumpkins?  Does this count, LOL?
-Read The Help by Kathryn Stockett COMPLETE-A little late on the read but it was a MARVELOUS book! I highly suggest it to any and everyone.
**ADDITIONAL-Purchase some Christmas gifts-I'd say we're about 1/3 of the way done already!
**ADDITIONAL-Definitely NOT fun but I finally got my tooth taken care of-yay!


Tally is:

Complete-9             Fail-2                     Additional-2                       Draw-1

Quick update

Why hello friends! I can't believe it is already the end of October-though the month itself seemed to go on FOREVER it is now bizarre that in 4 weeks Thanksgiving will be here!

I'm doing okay.  Let's see what I've been doing:

1) I have mourned the loss of my dear Uncle Clyde
2) I participated in Nashville's SlutWalk which was quite a great event
3) I have been collecting donations for the Shelter here in MBoro and plan on taking them (hopefully today or tomorrow)
4) I had a bit of a melt down about school last week and I have finally come to realize that the stress I am putting on myself about it has given me stomach aches.  And that needs to STOP.  After speaking candidly with one of my hardest yet accommodating professors, I felt a bit better.  He says: "I don't know why you're putting so much pressure on yourself or who you're comparing yourself to.  There's no need for it.  It's just school and everything will be alright."  It sounds so sill but I really needed to hear that from the faculty.  I actually wrote this sobbing blog (which I now refuse to post) about my fears and worries as both a person and a Graduate student.  I have decided not to delete it-I can check back on it when I am overwhelmed and know that it's going to be okay.
5) I officially got my crown put on-and it hurt.  Glad it's done but the process which wasn't supposed to be painful was.
6) I think I am getting sick-probably due to the crap I've been ingesting since school started.
7) I'd say I am about 1/3 of the way done with my Christmas shopping! I can't WAIT!

It looks like not a lot is going on but I've been SWAMPED with everything.  But it's all good-you'll see what I mean in November =]

SlutWalk 2011

On October 2nd I attended the Nashville SlutWalk.  It was a peace walk for sexual assault victims to raise awareness of the social stigma of the term "slut" and the issues we have in teaching (mostly) women on how not to get raped.

The issue really is in teaching (mostly) men on how NOT to rape!!

Check out some of the awesome signs everyone made and some other pictures.

Jamie's sign

I love this!

Jamie and CJ and their shirts and sign.  The shirts say "Got consent?" and "It's a dress-not a yes!"

More signs-at the start of walk #1.

A group coming back from walk #1-it was such a large group!! SO many signs and activism =]

My sign-it says "We do NOT ask for it."

Some of the group sitting listening to Stella Parton (author and sister to Dolly) describe her sexual assault, give some alarming stats, and sing us a song from the movie "The Color Purple".  Very inspiring.

It was a wonderful experience to know so many people wanted to come together to bring about more awareness for sexual assault victims.  I left after about an hour but when I left they did another walk and then held a candle light vigil in honor of those victims.  VERY cool.  Make sure you educate your self and others around you!

I suggest next time the SW rolls around in your town for you to attend-totally worth it.

My Uncle Clyde

I have been incredibly fortunate in having lost very few people in my life time.  Yes, I am still fairly young but I have known very few people who have passed and have yet to go to a funeral.

It's surreal.  And it happened.  He's gone...my Uncle Clyde has passed away.  He is the first person in my family (that I am close to and know) that has passed.  And it makes me so sad!  I mean duh, it makes me sad, but it's just so bizarre.  I don't really know how to handle it, ya know?

Last year I wrote a blog about an assortment of things and in it I mentioned Uncle Clyde:
"My Dot Dot (that's my grandmother's name) and Aunt Phyllis are staying in Chattanooga for about 2 months because my "Uncle" Clyde (not really my uncle but he's like my grandmothers brother so we call him that) is in very poor health and they're afraid he may not last too much longer...it really makes me sad. I've only had 3 people I know die and I was around 12 when my Great Grandmother Ruby died, about 15 or 16 when my Great Uncle David died and 21 when my mentor Dale McGillard died. I've never been to a funeral-and I don't really want to, as horrible as that sounds. But I think when my Uncle Clyde passes I will. I think it's time.  We have always had Christmas (and sometimes Thanksgiving) every year on my dad's side at Uncle Clyde's house. He used to chain smoke in his kitchen and watch birds in his backyard. He made the BEST food from scratch and could never tell you the recipes because they varied a little bit each time he made them! He always had at minimum 10 stray cats he would feed on his back porch. He's got every Disney movie (either on DVD, VHS, or both) EVER MADE on his shelves. he used to play the organ and do the score board for the local church down the hill. He collects a bunch of knick knacks and has the most comfortable guest bed on the planet. His sense of humor has and always will stay intact. When we would visit my dad on his weekends we would always go visit Uncle Clyde and swing on his rickety porch swing and climb his knobby tree in the front yard. I learned to throw a Frisbee in his back yard and have some fond memories that my dad and I shared at that house-like our early morning Dunkin' Donuts and t.v. time when I was a child...Now he is 5' 10" and weighs barely 100 lbs. He is on oxygen 24/7 and can no longer smoke. He doesn't have much energy to cook or do much now. He still watches his birds though. And now he's getting in to RetroTV, lol. I think he's starting to look back on his life. He's told Dot Dot that he's ready whenever. I think that's very admirable seeing that he's got prostate cancer, CHF, I think COPD, along with a few other ailments. He just turned 76 about 2 weeks ago.  After all of that I listed above, I still don't know much about him. I asked my Dot Dot some questions and this is what I got: His middle name is Marvin. He was engaged twice but never married. He used to have dark hair and eyes and has always been a bean pole. Now he's got no hair and looks like a mix of Jiminy Cricket and Ghandi-both smiley and happy-and still is a bean pole. He's always loved the heat (he never had air conditioning in his house until Dot Dot JUST put in a wall unit 2 weeks ago). His mother lived just down the street from him before she died a few years ago. He used to play the organ at the church down the hill from him. He was born in Chattanooga and lived in Harrison starting in 1949. I think when he passes he'll pass just fine. Quietly, in no pain, and probably in his sleep. I sit her crying a bit thinking about it, but I know that he's okay and ready to meet his maker so I can't be sad for him. I'll just miss him and Christmas will never be the same without him..."

And then he, being the stubborn man he is, lives to 77!  He got better for a while and then got weaker very quickly.  He refused home care.  He ended up getting a stint put in his heart.  And then his lung collapsed and it all went down hill from there....

I miss him so much.  It will be bizarre to have Christmas at his house this year without him there.  I love him. I miss him. Yet I am so glad I was fortunate enough to spend so much time with him in my lifetime and I was able to see him before he passed away, making him laugh and smile while he was in the hospital.  I am so fortunate that I have an incredibly close and strong family, a great network of friends and colleagues that are supportive, and professors who are compassionate and understanding.

I am fortunate because I knew Clyde.  Because he was my great uncle, my buddy.

And I miss him.

Huh....

Remember this blog?

Well-as of this summer Domestic Violence month has now been switched from November to October.

So...

If any of you are still interested in donating or helping out-NOW IS THE TIME!!  I have collected a good box full of goods that should really benefit.

Think of it as your good deed for the day and be pro-active in helping others!

PASS IT ON!

October Goals

There's so much going on in October I don't know how I'll squeeze it all in!

*School
-Submit abstract to ASA conference.
-Make all As on projects/papers/assignments.
-FALL BREAK (a much needed break indeed)!
-Attend the Undergraduate Symposium (and potentially present).

*Family
-Jen & Mom come to visit!
-Visit with Aunt Lynn during FFFF weekend (see below).
-Fall Family Fun Fest (FFFF) at the end of October! This is when ALL of the family on my mom's side gets together for food, lots of laughing, and games.

*Fun
-Attend the SlutWalk in Nashville with friends from school.
-Continue raising awareness and supplies for the battered shelter in my town.
-Celebrate Tonya's 25th birthday!
-Celebrate Halloween!
-Read The Help by Kathryn Stockett

It may not look too busy but my October (at least work load for school) is intense! 

You think I can handle it?

September Goals-completed

Alright-September has been CRAZY busy with school and stress but I think I accomplished a bit more than I thought I would-let's see!

*School/Research
-Officially select thesis topic (!!!!) and thesis committee. COMPLETE! Though I'm not ready to fully reveal details until I get approved ;]
-Continue research with Aday. COMPLETE-still working on it though not with as much vigor since we're starting my thesis stuff.  We're also starting a new project to test out my thesis design before I do my proposal.
-Make all A's on any projects/readings/papers/homework due. FAIL-I made one B...*grumble grumble*
-Meet with Jaime to start potential research. FAIL-we probably won't be able to jump start this until next semester but we're both really interested in the idea(s).

*Books
-Finish The Girl Who Kicked the Hornet's Nest by Stieg Larrson. COMPLETE! And it was so good.  I really enjoyed this series.
-Start and finish Sex in the South: Unbuckling the Bible Belt by Suzi Parker. FAIL-I decided to read another book instead (see my additional).
**Additional: Start and finish I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings by Maya Angelo.  A great read!**

*Work
-Volunteer in the Alzheimer's Walk. COMPLETE-KINDA-I was sick with a bad cold so I didn't technically do the walk (though I had planned on it!) but I did raise about $85 in the process so I'm counting it!
-Make baked goods for the Alzheimer's Bake Sale. COMPLETE-I made some yummy lemon-poppy seed muffins.

*Home
-Get a new couch (finally!!) COMPLETE-and it's gorgeous!
-Finish hanging pictures in living room. FAIL-I am having a hard time trying to figure out that last picture I want to hang.  It sounds silly but I just want it to be a good one, ya know? Maybe this weekend when "I have more time" I'll check it out and actually do it!
-Upload updated photos to the blog. FAIL-you want to know why? Because our apt. is flilthy and I don't want the blogosphere seeing it in this condition, LOL!


*Family
-Visit my Aunt Lynn & Uncle Clyde at some point (both of who are aren't doing well in their health and I am worried about them...more on that in a later blog).  DRAW-I was able to see Uncle Clyde but not Aunt Lynn.  I should be able to see her in October when I come down for FFFF (see October goals for details).
-Send sister her birthday present. She's 29! COMPLETE-I got her some cute personalized stationary with her initials on it-she loves stationary just as much as I do so I really hope she liked it! I also got her a card and an anniversary card since her wedding anny. is only a few days after her birthday.

*Fun
-Sign up for the Nashville Slut Walk. COMPLETE-and I can't WAIT for it! A bunch of us from school are going and a handful are making signs saying things like "Got consent?" and "We didn't ask for it" to help support those of sexual assault.  I'll blog about that later once I do it!
-Start to organize a donation drive for battered women/domestic abuse victims here in my county.  COMPLETE! Did you check out this blog?  You really should...it's for a GREAT cause!!  This is an ongoing project until November so I'll be bringing it up off and on throughout the next 2 months.
-Start the coaster crafts (found on my pinterest.com page). FAIL-again...no time! Maybe over Fall Break?
**Additional-A bunch of the Grad students got together for some Mexican, mingling and Margaritas! It was great fun.**

So the tally is:

COMPLETE- 9                        FAIL- 6                          ADDITIONAL- 2                     DRAW- 1

All in all not too bad but you can clearly see where my priorities are falling *cough SCHOOL cough*!

I'm going to take it easier in October, yes?

We can all help

This summer, I took an entire class completely devoted to topics on violence within the family. It is sad that there have been so many victims and so much hurt that courses and seminars are being taught regarding it! What was once normal practice, and then a taboo topic has finally made its way into the limelight of the criminal justice system and into mainstream societal issues.


So today, for previous victims and for those who want to help prevent further victims, I am dedicating this blog to facts about violence against women in the family setting, information on where/how to seek help, and asking for your help in making a change.

**NOTE: This won't be a happy/cheery blog but it doesn't need to be; there is nothing happy or cheery about this type of abuse. But this is not about male bashing or making you think all partners are out to hurt you-it's about taking a stand, making those around aware of the prevalence and issues we face, and letting those who may be in these circumstances know that they are not alone.**

Some Facts

* Approximately 4.8 million intimate partner rapes and physical assaults are perpetrated against U.S. women annually, and approximately 2.9 million intimate partner physical assaults are committed against U.S. men annually. These findings suggest that intimate partner violence is a serious criminal justice and public health concern. (NVAW Survey 2000).

*Source: http://crisis-support.helium.com/topic/4954-domestic-violence

*Violence against women includes but is not limited to the following: 1) Physical, sexual, and psychological violence occurring in the family, including battering; sexual abuse of children in the household, dowry-related violence, marital rape, female genital mutilation and other traditional practices harmful to women, non-spousal violence, and violence related to exploitation. 2) Physical, sexual, and psychological violence occurring within the general community including rape, sexual abuse, sexual harassment and intimidation at work and educational institutions and elsewhere, trafficking in women, and forced prostitution. 3) Physical, sexual, and psychological violence perpetrated or condoned by the State, wherever it occurs.

*1 Woman is killed every 7.4 hours by an intimate partner in the United States. (FBI, 2005)

*Source: http://crisis-support.helium.com/topic/4954-domestic-violence

*Among women aged 15 to 44 years, violence against women accounts for more death and disability than cancer, malaria, traffic injuries, and war put together.

Does this not astound you? It makes me sick to my stomach. The worse part is: we have probably all come into contact with a victim of this type of abuse, whether we knew it or not. So I am here to take a stand against it. I am speaking out, trying to inform the masses about these issues and how they need to stop. There is enough violence in the world without intimate partners getting involved in the mix. If we push the idea of the family being the safe-haven then let us MAKE IT a safe haven!

Know the Red Flags of a Battering Personality*:

1. Quick Involvement

2. Jealousy

3. Controlling Behavior

4. Unrealistic Expectations

5. Isolation

6. Blames Others for Problems

7. Blames Others for Feelings

8. Hypersensitivity

9. Cruelty to Animals and Children

10. Playful use of Force During Sex

11. Verbal Abuse

12. Rigid Sex Roles

13. Sudden Mood Swings

14. Past Battering

15. Threats of Violence

*source: Legal Aid Society of Middle Tennessee and the project for victims of Family Violence, Fayetteville, Arkansas

Where to seek help/shelter:

1) Call the 24 hour, 7 days a week National DV hotline: http://www.thehotline.org/

2) Search for shelters and help in your area: http://www.thehotline.org/get-help/help-in-your-area/

3) Share your voice. Remember: you are not alone: http://www.thehotline.org/category/share-your-voice/ 

Would you like to help?

Here are a few ways how:

1) Spread this blog, and other sites you've found information from to as many people as possible. NO-I am not trying to get a huge following. I am trying to EDUCATE, EDUCATE, EDUCATE! The more people that see this and at least read about it, the better.

2) Volunteer at your local domestic violence/sexual assault shelter. It is great help, a fantastic learning experience and a good deed for all involved. There are many tasks and each city or surrounding area would greatly appreciate it!

3) Donate! I've got a sidebar set up on the right hand side for donations-these will go directly to the domestic violence/sexual assault center right in my town. The funds can be used for buying items on their wish list or can be given directly as cash-YOU decide! If you don't donate to my funds-donate to the local shelter where you're from! Donations of any kind whether in monetary or goods are all helpful and beneficial to those in need.

I hope I raised you up! I hope you realize the prevalence of these issues! I hope you want to HELP! I hope you took notice, understood that this is much more common than most realize, and that there are always ways that you can help!

November is the National Domestic Violence Awareness month so let’s get some donations/volunteering and knowledge under our belts by then!

Remember to share the love,
JR