Ah the ups and downs of this mad, mad world

Well well darling devils-hello again!  It's been a small minute since I last wrote but let me tell ya-it's been crazy around here!

After Spring Cleaning and coming out with 2 HUGE boxes and 2 trash bags full of things to give away, I feel both accomplished and excited.  We still need to go through all of the kitchen stuff but that shouldn't be too much of a feat.

I had my bridal shower this past weekend-it was AMAZING!! My aunts, sister, and mom set it all up and it was so sweet! The cake was YUMMY, the decor was darling, and of course, the presents were ballin'!

Der and I got a lot of great things to help start off our marriage!  Beautiful and meaningful gifts-a girl could easily live like this  ;]

Once we move we're really going to unload and use all of these new things! Since we'll be moving in about a month-we're probably justs keep most of the stuff in its good condition until we hit the road so we don't have to move all of the old AND new stuff-just the new!

It was SO SO nice to see some of my friends again!  Some of them I haven't seen in quiet a long time so it was fantastic getting to do a bit of catching up and letting them know the details of the wedding-only 38 more days!!  It will be so grand when it's all said and done and I can be "Mrs. Raley" officially.  I've been practicing writing it so it won't be a complete shock when I've got to start signing everything that way, haha!

But of course, with the good there always comes a little bad.  I had my flower consultant forget my appointment Saturday morning and even when she was called to come back she "didn't due to overtime"-but to me that's a crock of shit because it's Prom season so overtime is kind of a given this month.  Needless to say I was beyond livid and very upset.  Luckily, my best friend and Maid of Honor-Destiny-has found a different place with a kind and courteous staff who WILL stay in my budget and get my flowers and schemes right because that's what they're supposed to do!  She really came through for me today and definitely proved herself (as she has over and over again) as to what a good and true friend she really is  <3  

Then today, after finding out that she took care of my flower ordeal, I come home to a delinquency notice from a SCAM that used my name and a credit card number that is NOT mine! Now-they're threatening to put this on my credit report because they have my address and phone number unless I get this paid!!!  It's a bunch of crap and I was (and am) VERY upset about it-thank god I've got Trish and Derrick to help me out of this because this has happened to them too.  *Le Sigh* I never understand why it always happens to me, lol.  BUT-after a spat with Boo and a heavy sweat-a-thon at the gym, I'm feeling a bit better-just fatigued. Like they always say: it'll be okay-it always is.  Just sometimes I need to be a 6 year old and pout because it let's me seethe and think a bit before calming down, lol. Oh, and the spat is resolved, haha.

Now I've got more great things to look forward to in the next few weeks like: cleaning the apartment this weekend (sounds silly but it really needs to happen, lol), putting up our new gifts, starting "Thank You" cards, working out, taking donations and recyclables, hanging out in the nice weather, getting excited about my birthday, taking Tucker on walks, PAYDAY-to pay off my dress and Derrick's tux, small packing for the move, my bridal tea thrown by my Matron of Honor-my sister Jen-which should be amazing since we get to play dress up, my Bachelorette Party thrown by Shelley, Kelly & Destiny (which should be interesting, haha!), cake trials with Lauren, and simply counting down before I get married to my best friend!!  It'll be intense yet fun-and I can't even begin to tell you how I'm feeling...

It's good.

Spring Cleaning-Day II

I'm so proud of Der. He really took one for the team and got rid of sooooooo much stuff! Granted, we still have a bunch but I'm pleased to say we've rid ourselves (and namely our apartment) of a lot of clutter and such.  There were some childhood toys that didn't make it-mostly because of moving-but the ones that did are in pretty good condition and it was kind of nice getting a glimpse into my incredibly geeky fiancés childhood. 

                     The Power Rangers and Star Wars Lego sets were present yesterday to help us grieve over the toys that didn't survive.  




Today I will be tackling our bedroom and my things (due to Derrick trusting me and not caring enough of what I get rid of, lol) so this shouldn't be too much of an issue.  Luckily it will mostly be a cleaning thing once Der wakes up...he had bad indigestion last night so sleep didn't occur until like 6:30 this morning-poor guy!


But I am a bit proud of myself too: in the past 10 months that I've lived here I have LITERALLY given away 3 huge black garbage bags full of clothes, shoes, and accessories and-here's the catch-NOT bought new things! So, even though my closet needs a serious overhaul-especially for the summer time-I am waiting to buy new clothes for the following reasons:


1) Once the wedding is over I'll have a bit more money to splurge
2) If we decide to move it'd be bet to make sure I have a walk-in before I buy a new wardrobe or it could lead to some serious woes in the clothes/space/closet department
3) I don't have much time to shop yet (minus the few measly minutes I'm spending writing this blog)
4) I'm hoping to still loose a bit of weight
and 5) I can wait.  Though I LOVE clothes and all of its glories-shoes, scarves, purses, and especially jewelry-I can wait.  I am not so bold and spoiled that I can't wait for it to become an actual issue.  The best way for me to do this it to simply just not go to the mall, lol.


At least our place doesn't look like that (see below).

So, as the day continues, I will be cleaning up the messes we made yesterday, dropping off donations to various locales, and hopefully working out and doing laundry before it's time for some serious sleep.


Much love my chickpeas.  <3

"Oh what a beautiful morning, Oh what a beautiful day."

This weekend will be one of cleaning, organizing, purging, and sleeping.  Today is the start of Spring Cleaning in the Raley B3 abode.  Derrick does NOT look forward to getting rid of a lot of his stuff but I told him we're doing it together.  Since in 47 days we will officially (and legally) be fully starting out our new lives and new journey together, we need it a bit less hectic and need a bit more room.

We will most likely be moving into a smaller place so we've got to minimize our stuff. We won't be touching the kitchen yet though...because you see my WEDDING SHOWER is next weekend! April 3rd! And since like 90% of what's received at showers is kitchen stuff, we'll wait until we bring those amazing goodies brought to us from fabulous friends and family home to tackle the kitchen.  So everything but the kitchen will be gone through, cleaned/organized, and the things we finally find we do not need or want will be donated or sold because, darlings, that just how we roll.

I'm actually kind of excited about it because it's getting closer to the wedding and closer to our move. WOW. It's all happening so soon!

Can't wait <3

Today though, will be a LONG one with a few spats in trying to pry Derrick away from some jeans he won't wear but won't sell and him asking me to get rid of some purses.

BUT: we shall do it in the name of each other...I hope.

There's burn coming from the oven...

YES. 52 days! WHAT!?

Okay, now that the wedding bizarre closeness is out of the way...

I'm baking some cheesy chicken alfredo while Derrick naps before his night lab. Usually, this would irk me, but since I'm reading "Sybil" and writing, I'm okay with it, ha! I know I know-it's so silly to get frustrated about things of that small magnitude but if we haven't met then this of course, wouldn't make any sense.  Yet I am okay with it =]

On to other pointless news: I think I will be a re-admit to MTSU but for a B.S. in Psychology! I have already technically been readmitted but I think I stated I was undeclared because I've been bouncing back and forth between getting psychology b.s. or going on with my Masters.  I think since Der still has another year of undergrad. and we can't afford for me to be totally engrossed in school right now, I'm thinking a Psychology degree would be good-especially since it's just 35 hours and I can TOTALLY do that (I think, lol). I haven't fully delved into the research of the requirements, classes, etc. but I'm liking the idea.

I really need to clean. I think I will.....after dinner, haha!

I know this is fairly pointless but I like it and it's for me mostly anyway-blog=love.

The wedding stuff if coming along well!  In 2 weeks will be our wedding shower-April 3rd! From then on out time will be FLOODING over me and I may drown in the sheer excitement of it all.  I've got flowers, make-up (Thanks to Kelly S.), lingerie, food, and our scrapbook to update and fully figure out. It's all details and time now! SWEET.

Love you all <3

Well, that was short lived...

I am off the phentermine 37.5 meds. Granted, total I lost about 5 pounds in 3 weeks, but I also felt miserably nauseous and off the whole time-trust me, I'd like to loose the weight but I DO NOT want to feel sick all of the time.

So, especially since the weather is getting nicer and nicer I can get back into my workout regimen again-I truly do love to work out! Today I plan on taking Tucker on a walk (if the rain holds out!) and then going to the gym with Der. I like staying fit I just have the tendency to get lazy sometimes-at least I'll admit it though.

On to other news: I get married in 61 days! I literally don't think I've ever been this excited about anything in my life. I mean duh, it's a wedding but it's MINE and DERRICKS! It's our own! Surprisingly, it's not even the ceremony and reception I'm super stoked about (though I am absolutely thrilled!) I'm just excited to start our life together as Mr. and Mrs. Raley (hence the profile name change, lol). We are slowly starting our family beginning with our dog, Tucker-

<--- that's him-our baby. We've realized that we don't even need to have kids yet because Tucker is ours! He's defiantly in his terrible 2s, lol! Der and I have both been asked when we plan on having kids and we know we want to wait at least a couple of years especially since we've pretty much got our own kid. I mean you've got to admit,

he's precious =D We were talking the other day about how we have more pictures on our phones of Tucker than we do of each other, haha! We can't help it-he steals the heart with his kisses.

We have an apartment together with Tucker and split chores: I do laundry, he takes the trash and gets the mail, we split doing the dishes and vacuuming, I tidy up, he makes the bed. We have a good give&get/tug&pull relationship and I take much pride in that. I am falling more and more in love with life all over again. It has taken a while and many tears of my own to reach this point in my life-I went through a horrible break up that left me scared and broken for a long while-even went on anti depressants-but I have come out on the other side with bright eyes, hope, a smile plastered on my face and a wonderful partner holding my hand and chin up the entire time. He does NOT complete me; I do not believe in that and he knows my feelings on that. I do NOT think he is "my other half" and he also knows this and agrees; I do not feel it takes another person to complete someone-just to add to your life-and that is exactly what Derrick does for me. He adds on to the things I find near and dear in my life and I add on to his.

I look forward to where our lives will take us and what journeys we will begin and take with one another. I mean isn't that what life-in general-is all about?!

Maybe I don't say it enough but I am thankful for what I have in life-the sorrows and the joys.

Love, Love, Love. Always.

Week 1 down

Well: 1 week down on Phentermine 37.5. For the first few days I felt a bit jittery, but still had a bit of an appetite. Luckily, the jitters have mostly subsided and the appetite still stays the same. I go to the MD on Thursday. That'll be 2 weeks exactly since I've started...hopefully we shall have a bit of weight loss! Fingers crossed. I hope it works...I have noticed that my pants aren't AS tight...

Today is Kelly's 23rd birthday! Yay! I remember when she turned 19! We've been best friends since my freshman year of college, and it's nice we've remained that way. Our lives have changed dramatically but it's great we're still there for one another; I mean both she and her husband are going to be in our wedding! She has 2 GORGEOUS, AMAZING sons (Andrew 2, Dylan 1 week) that I am absolutely head-over-heels in love with. I am proud of her. She's had to deal with a lot of crap and she still comes out laughing and with a smile.

I'm just proud of my friends in general. I love them. I have 3 bests: Destiny, Kelly, and Shelley. They are all amazing and so fantastic and I am proud to know them and especially to call them my friend.

Derrick and I had a tiny rough patch for about a week. Most of it was me bottling up and trying to work through things on my own-one thing he dreads because he wants to help-and it came to a bit of a head last night...luckily it was resolved and we talked through it (like we always do) and all is well in the almostraley house hold.

A bit of randoms, I know, but just an update of some kind for the "fans", lol.

Love is being sent to you and you should accept it!

<3

Brutal Honesty: Beware!

Alright, here it comes kiddos. The moment of truth. Brutal honesty that I (surprisingly) am not ashamed to share comes your way.

I weigh 175 pounds. I am 5'3". This is NOT okay. Not even by my vain standards; this isn't okay according to my BMI (Body Mass Index). According to these numbers, I am overweight. I don't like it.

True, I don't like the way my clothes fit and the snugness of my pants doesn't help but I really don't like that it's just plain unhealthy. So, on that note:

My Doctor has prescribed me to Phentermine 37.5 MG tablets. It's for 30 days. Anytime it needs to be refilled, I must see my doctor, get my weight, blood pressure/sugars checked, and monitor my progress. I have received good and bad advice about this per friends/family/Internet readings. I can't say I'm not excited about it. I hope to achieve a size 5/6 again instead of the 13/14 that I am now. It is also to give me energy. I can't tell you just how exciting that makes me...it's literally on par with loosing weight. I have gone almost 4 months on what CONSTANTLY feels like 2 hours of sleep. Anything to give me energy and something to perk me up that doesn't make me crash like coffee or Adderol is very exciting. As of now, it seem like the right thing for me to do. I did not ask for this prescription. I was hoping for advice, maybe some nutritional info. and some diet plans; instead I received a quick fix to slim me down and perk me up. Legal crack really. And I'm okay with it.

But here is what I plan on doing to make my weight loss a bit different: the doctors office has a Nutritionist on site. I go for a follow up tomorrow, 2/11/2010 and I will be asking to set up a consultation with her. I don't want to just take a pill and slim down. Because that means, once I go off of it, the weight will just come back. It's not rocket science. I also don't like the idea of just having to take a pill for the rest of my life to keep thin. That idea=LAME.

I want to still work out, eat well, and take very good care of myself so when I do come off of the pills, weight will be put back on, but not by leaps/bounds/sizes like they have been. I want to be back to 130 lbs. Total. Now, and forever. I don't want to be a size 2 or weight 110 pounds. It's not right for my height, frame, or age. I am comfortable with who I am as a person, just not my size.

Vain-check. Superficial-check. Honest-check. I am okay with these checks on my list. But I want to do it healthily eventually. I want to go off of pills, continue with my eating and working out routines and just live clean and smooth and slim. And right now, if a pill can help me jump start this long and arduous path, then so be it. I can be content with that for the time being.

Tomorrow, Thursday 2/11/2010, will be my first day of taking Phentermine. I will monitor my weight loss and information every week so I can share my results and watch my own progress. I don't have a scale, so I will do what I can to update per pounds lost. Every time I have the chance to weigh myself, I will.

I have grown tired of being ashamed of my weight and what I am/want to be. I will not shy away from my size and number. I do not define myself by a number, but I do want my personal knowledge of my weight to be set at ease; reducing that number can help-I know this. I will tell how much I have lost/gained/leveled.

I am not ashamed of growing (or I guess in this case, loosing) =]

*News flash- Below is the actual definition of what "diet" means:

di·et 1 n. The usual food and drink of a person or animal. A regulated selection of foods, as for medical reasons or cosmetic weight loss. Something used, enjoyed, or provided regularly: subsisted on a diet of detective novels during his vacation.